Having just celebrated my 40th birthday, and just turning the corner to a new decade, I guess there's a lot to say. Overall my life has been filled with so many moments of thinking that everything happens for a reason. Having faced many uncontrolled challenges, I always try to see the good in what results. Through the years, I continue to wonder why, and am always questioning.
So I guess I'll go back to my time of greatest innocence, where the fate of where I am today began. I'm a typical 7 year old child, living in Rockland County, NY with my mother, father and 2 older sisters. This is back in the Spring of 1976. All was well, as far as I knew, until one day when I told my parents I was seeing double. While noone wants to think this is anything to really worry about, I can remember my mother telling me she would make me an eye doctors appointment. My first thoughts was worrying that I might need glasses. Little did I know that after seeing the Eye Doctor, who was concerned after looking in my eyes, he then had us follow up with my Peditrician. After seeing the doctor, I remember playing in the waiting room with my sisters. Shortly after, my mother came out saying we needed to go to the hospital. Long story short, I was then admitted to Mount Sinai Medical Center in NY for an approximate 2 month stay for a non-malignant (not cancerous) brain tumor.There are so many details from that time I can remember; good, bad, scary, sad and yet what seemed to me normal and positive. Since this is my first post, I won't get into the detailed memories. It's more of the end results that seem to matter most. While not really understanding the significance of what having a "brain tumor" meant, yet being scared and frightened of every needle, test and operation I had to experience, I came out of it all looking back as if it were a positive experience. Something I did, I got through, that noone else I knew had. I always attributed this to the fact that my parents were there with me throughout it all. Supporting me, helping me and most of all advocating for me. I had my own private room, filled with gifts from friends and family who would visit often.
Years later, when thinking of "what I wanted to be when I grew up", these experiences all came back to me. I could remember two boys who were in the hospital the same time I was. I never remembered seeing their parents, only the two of them having wheel chair races down the hallways. I would invite them into my room to play Connect-4 and other games. I always wondered; who helped them, who held their hands when they needed blood tests, who made sure they were OK? I wanted to be that person; someone who was an advocate, a friend, someone to turn what could be a negative experience into a positive one. When I would talk about this with my parents the only conclusion we could come to was that there was no such "job title", only volunteers.
Upon applying to colleges thinking I would study Child Psychology, I was lucky enough to meet a professor at the University of Delaware who introduced me to the field of Child Life. Over 20 years later I still get the same response...Child Life Specialist??? Here's the current definition from the Child Life Council (http://www.childlife.org/)...
Child life specialists are experts in child development, who promote effective coping through play, preparation, education, and self-expression activities. They provide emotional support for families, and encourage optimum development of children facing a broad range of challenging experiences, particularly those related to healthcare and hospitalization. Understanding that a child’s wellbeing depends on the support of the family, child life specialists provide information, support and guidance to parents, siblings, and other family members. They also play a vital role in educating caregivers, administrators, and the general public about the needs of children under stress.
Throughout my class, "The Hospitalized Child", I would sit in awe listening to the theories and ideas about how the hospital experience can effect a child and how there are so many things that can be done to make it easier. I would nod my head in agreement, feeling as if I could have written this all myself.
Well, here I am 33 years later after my first hospital experience. I am a seasoned, almost 20 years, certified Child Life Specialist. I presently work as a coordinator of a Child Life program at a Children's Hospital in Morristown, NJ. There have been many other life changing events throughout this time, but for now this is a glimpse into my thoughts of how everything happens for a reason and how negative experiences can be ultimatly turned into positve, growth producing ones.
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